I was the quiet shy kid. I had no real problems in school. Except I was the last minute student. Every single assignment that I had from elementary to graduate school was turned in 5 to 10 minutes late on the day it was due. I always had an excuse. I could never get anything completed within its time frame. I always felt like a failure. I was extremely critical of everything I did. I’d find fault in every successful accomplishment.
My form of organization usually worked for me. I say usually because I’ve spent the majority of my life with stacks of paper in different places throughout my home and on my desk at work. My stacks of paper was my way of organizing my life.
When I first started working in my current position as a team leader; I realized I was a team leader responsible for the caseload of 7 employees. I was always trying to remember every case each employee was assigned. As a student I used my memory to make it through each lesson. I thought I was organized but in actuality I was literally maintaining chaos.
In an effort to create order one of my coworkers who is also a very good friend would come to my office and help me clear out all the things that were no longer needed. This became a yearly event.
I’d ask myself why I couldn’t keep my office in some form of order. I finally decided to buy myself a Franklin Covey planner. I had remembered that my agency offered training for employees to better organize themselves and their schedule.
Imagine my surprise when I tried to enroll in the training and was told it was for upper management only. I thought “why would you place restrictions on a training that would benefit a lot of people’? So I had to learn the organizational basics through trial error and observation. That plan never worked so I fell back on my chaotic way of organizing my job responsibilities and life.
I was in my late thirties before I learned what was wrong. I was so upset that for years I was trying to get everything right and was misdiagnosed. My former doctor’s diagnosis was anxiety and depression. I was placed on medication that I did not need.